Worst Case Ontario
3:24 Mon Apr 25
Re: Football related questions asked by the Doris
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Not a question, but she always refers to them as "the Arsenals".
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JustAFatKevinDavies
3:18 Mon Apr 25
Re: Football related questions asked by the Doris
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tried to explain the premise of the champions league to her
'oh so its for the best teams from each country like Barcelona for example?'
yes that's it
'and real Madrid?'
yep you've got it
'and Belgium.?'
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BRANDED
3:12 Mon Apr 25
Re: Football related questions asked by the Doris
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Mrs: Is the offside rule really necessary? Me:No its not. Its a load of fucking wank. Mrs: Why are so many decisions by the ref so poor and shouldnt they use technology? Me: Because they're cheating slapheads and yes they fucking well should. Mrs: Is Steve Bruce really an ugly Cunt?
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Luisa
3:10 Mon Apr 25
Re: Football related questions asked by the Doris
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I went out with this fella once and he was great but knew 'nothing about football'. didn't last long after that quote..about 21 minutes I think it was
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Big E
3:02 Mon Apr 25
Re: Football related questions asked by the Doris
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If mine ever asks me anything about football I keep this handy and tell her to look it up.
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Motsons-National-Obsession-Greatest-Football-y/dp/1860746012
Decent little book for trivial questions posed by bints when you're trying to watch the game (because that's when they normally ask isn't it)
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penners28
3:00 Mon Apr 25
Re: Football related questions asked by the Doris
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im quite lucky as my mrs was brought up with football due to her dad, so she knows her stuff.
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Eggbert Nobacon
2:53 Mon Apr 25
Re: Football related questions asked by the Doris
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the Wimbledon match when we lost after being 3-0 up
me walking through door
Ex "4-3 that must have been good"
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Sniper
2:48 Mon Apr 25
Re: Football related questions asked by the Doris
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The only three things that my missus ever says about football are:
Where are West Ham in the league?
(Regardless of the response she then asks)
Oh that's good isn't it?
And
Is Wayne Rooney really any good? (Though she never listens to the reply)
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Darlo Debs
2:38 Mon Apr 25
Re: Football related questions asked by the Doris
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Really letting the side down aren't they? :-(
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gph
11:49 Mon Apr 25
Re: Football related questions asked by the Doris
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The only daft question I got was daft because of the timing: "That Berbatov is some player, isn't he?", right after he had just scored/provided an assist* against us at Old Trafford.
*That I've forgotten which shows how shit my memory's become
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andyd12345
10:02 Mon Apr 25
Re: Football related questions asked by the Doris
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When David Beckham moved to Real Madrid she asked "Is he still allowed to play for England, or does he have to play for Spain now?"
Facepalm.
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Far East Hammer
6:25 Mon Apr 25
Re: Football related questions asked by the Doris
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Mrs FEH: What difference does it make whether or not West Ham win, especially as they rarely win? (Note: said in the days of Grant)
Meself and Far East Hammerette:... (i.e. met with incredulous silence)
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mallard
11:03 Sun Apr 24
Re: Football related questions asked by the Doris
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After the euphoria of winning the play-off final, against Preston, on the long drive home from Cardiff to Kent,
Doris - What was the score ?
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charleyfarley
9:14 Sun Apr 24
Re: Football related questions asked by the Doris
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steve p ag ag made me chuckle
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Far Cough
9:02 Sun Apr 24
Re: Football related questions asked by the Doris
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My missus: What is offside?
Me: shrugs shoulders
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Steve P
9:01 Sun Apr 24
Re: Football related questions asked by the Doris
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Mrs P thought Beckham would play for Spain once he signed for Madrid.
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Troy McClure
9:00 Sun Apr 24
Re: Football related questions asked by the Doris
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From a mate a few years back who'd taken his Doris to watch Swindon....
Doris: Why do they have 1879 on their badge? Is it the last time they won the World Cup?
Fomb
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charleyfarley
8:56 Sun Apr 24
Re: Football related questions asked by the Doris
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My missus, during one of the games being refereed by Pierluigi Collina (i think he had a yellow kit on) asked "why does nobody pass the ball to the bald bloke?" Me and the kids looked at each other, no laughter, no humiliating comments. Just stunned silence!!
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lab
8:52 Sun Apr 24
Re: Football related questions asked by the Doris
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When England went 1-0 down in Munich . . . If England win this can I suck your giggle stick ? I went to bed a very happy bunny that night .
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Jim C
8:44 Sun Apr 24
Re: Football related questions asked by the Doris
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Mrs C told me that when we first got together, my now mother in law thought I supported Totenham as she "got confused with the ham at the end".
Thankfully my now father in law laughed, corrected her and told her how big of an error it was before we were due to play them the following weekend.
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Bouncing Ludo
6:55 Sun Apr 24
Re: Football related questions asked by the Doris
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Many years ago, with a previous female acquaintance....
Her: Doesn't Trevor Brooking play for West Ham anymore ?
Me: No, he's still at West Ham
Her : Well how come he plays for England as well ?
(this was at a time when the two things were not mutually exclusive as they are now)
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